Dirty Paws Kratom 
**NICKY HERE.** Yeah, the dog. Also the CEO. Long story.
Listen, my humans usually write these posts, but I'm taking over because they were gonna make this boring. We've got a sale that's too good for them to mess up with their "professional tone" nonsense.
Visit us: DirtyPawsKratom.com or DirtyPawsBotanicals.com
THE BIG ONE: HOLIDAY SALE $60 SPLIT KILOS
Normally $90. Now $60.
NO CODE NEEDED.
The price is already changed on the site. That's it. That's the whole thing.
NOW through December 25th.
Black Friday? We started early. Cyber Monday? We don't even know what that means. We're just running this thing straight through the holidays because apparently I'm in a generous mood.
**Build your own:** Four strains, two strains, one strain—split it however you want. You're the boss. (Well, I'm the boss, but you get to pick the strains.)
TELL YOUR FRIENDS Seriously. **This is how we grow.**
We're not some massive company with a marketing budget. We're a small family operation, and we need YOU to help spread the word.
- **Got a friend who uses kratom?** Tell them about us. Send them the link. Screenshot this post. Whatever.
- **In a kratom group?** Share us. Tag us. Talk about us.
- **Happy with your order?** Tell people. Word of mouth is everything to a small business.
**Help us out. Spread the word. We'll keep the prices fair and the quality solid.**
OTHER DEALS WORTH MENTIONING - **First order ever?** Code DOUBLEM20 gets you 20% off (yes, it stacks with the $60 kilo price).
- **Post a review** anywhere—show us—and we'll send you 30% off your next order. Good review, bad review, "this dog needs to stop writing these posts" review. Whatever. Be honest.
SAMPLES & STUFF - Sample pricing: First one is $3, then $1 each after (3 sample max).
- Already ordering? Pick **two free samples** on us.
THE NICKY GUARANTEE
Look, I don't have thumbs, so I can't personally pack your order. But I oversee quality control, which mostly involves napping near the inventory and looking disappointed when things aren't up to standard.
Here's what we do:
**Powder only** – No extracts, no 7-hydroxymitragynine, no weird stuff Every order gets my paw stamp (it's official and legally binding, probably) **Something wrong?** We'll fix it. My humans are pushovers about this stuff.WHY LISTEN TO A DOG?
Fair question. Here's the thing: my family uses kratom. It's helped them. So yeah, they're annoyingly picky about quality because they actually care.
Also, I'm cute. That's not relevant to kratom quality, but it's true.
We're not some massive operation. It's just us. Family thing. We keep prices fair, product clean, and we don't BS you.
**But we need your help to grow.** Tell people about us. Share this post. Send your friends our way. That's literally all we ask.
TL;DR (FOR HUMANS WITH SHORT ATTENTION SPANS)
$60 SPLIT KILOS – NO CODE NEEDED (NOW through Dec 25th!) Build your own – your choice of strains (250g each) **20% OFF** first orders – Code: DOUBLEM20 (stacks with sale!) **30% OFF** when you leave a review **2 Free Samples** with orders **Powder only** – no extracts or 7OH **Something wrong?** We'll make it right. TELL YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT USBOTTOM LINE
There are a thousand kratom vendors. Most of them don't have a dog CEO. Coincidence? I think not.
This is the best sale we're running all year. And if you like what we're doing? **Tell people.** That's how small businesses survive.
Check us out: DirtyPawsKratom.com or DirtyPawsBotanicals.com
—Nicky
(My humans helped me type this because paws and keyboards don't mix)
PROOF I'M REAL AND VERY IMPORTANT
